Interviewed!

So last Tuesday I made my way to mid-town Atlanta to visit the regional offices of the DSS for my formal security interview. It took under an hour, and according to my investigator, I brought more paperwork than most (must be the old attorney genes). The interview went something like this:

Investigator: "So I see you have [INSERT EMBARRASSING PAST INDISCRETION HERE], do you have any documentation to indicate that [INSERT EMBARRASSING PAST INDISCRETION HERE] has been resolved?"

Me: BAM! Slapping a phone book worth of docs on the table, "You'll see I have my paperwork in order."

Investigator: "I see...okay, all done here."

And that was pretty much it. Lot's of repetitive questions, the correct answers of which are:

I don't recommend bringing the duck and rhino to the interview, though. And yes, I do have 2 kids under the age of 4 at home. How did you know?